he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Randomize