I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
