Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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