I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Randomize
