Kareoke will never be a sober sport
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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