everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize