the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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