He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
