so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
