whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Randomize
