There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I just threw up on my dentist
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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