While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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