He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize