Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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