I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize
