I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think I am morally bankrupt
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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