Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
