So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
