I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
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