ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Randomize
