A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize