oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
