Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(302): View more from Delaware

Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?

(1-302): View more from Delaware

That's okay, it's all protein anyway.

Fav 68 3917 1114
share tweet
(603): View more from New Hampshire

he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??

Fav 22 4904 1093
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.

Fav 14 4139 1637
share tweet
(720): View more from Colorado

Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.

Fav 7 6543 1192
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(604): View more from British Columbia

We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.

Fav 5 1850 976
share tweet
(917): View more from New York City

u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.

Fav 4 3092 1131
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(660): View more from Missouri

He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.

(816): View more from Missouri

Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...

Fav 7 2050 1039
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(208): View more from Idaho

Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.

Fav 10 1437 682
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(604): View more from British Columbia

Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.

Fav 0 23 0
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT