i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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