dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
