I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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