It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
