As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
