my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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