It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
