I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize