Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
