That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i think i have two assholes
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
