Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.

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  (517): I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans. http://tfl.nu/ad7f
  Replies (8) Good night (884) Bad night (3436)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  followup question: what if both somones were me?

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  (610): if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/? (610): followup question: what if both somones were me? http://tfl.nu/emdv
  Replies (18) Good night (857) Bad night (4752)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.

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  (914): I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box. http://tfl.nu/rmin
  Replies (22) Good night (5752) Bad night (904)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff

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  (303): I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff http://tfl.nu/0hbk
  Replies (2) Good night (2846) Bad night (796)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.

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  (410): she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night. http://tfl.nu/m7fi
  Replies (5) Good night (2518) Bad night (1046)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.

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  (440): My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made. http://tfl.nu/g5vb
  Replies (16) Good night (6313) Bad night (1270)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?

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  (570): Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer? http://tfl.nu/m731
  Replies (20) Good night (1625) Bad night (646)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.

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  (850): I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in. http://tfl.nu/gea0
  Replies (4) Good night (709) Bad night (1469)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.

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  (734): If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend. http://tfl.nu/pm1j
  Replies (13) Good night (3114) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I was tackling you out of excitement

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.

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  (316): I was tackling you out of excitement (918): Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall. http://tfl.nu/io5x
  Replies (3) Good night (1314) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  You rang?

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.

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  (707): You rang? (405): Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone. http://tfl.nu/xnwm
  Replies (15) Good night (2351) Bad night (778)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom

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  (703): I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom http://tfl.nu/16e5
  Replies (5) Good night (610) Bad night (1490)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.

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  (954): When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex. http://tfl.nu/36q6
  Replies (4) Good night (1182) Bad night (230)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.

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  (407): I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case. http://tfl.nu/43fa
  Replies (6) Good night (644) Bad night (293)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.

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  (720): I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/9e16
  Replies (2) Good night (405) Bad night (222)

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