ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
