You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
