If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
