Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
