You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
