KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
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I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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