don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.