I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
