Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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