Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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