We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Randomize
