Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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