My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
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I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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