Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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