I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
