butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
