Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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